1. |
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I am always working but I don’t have any money
You’re always telling jokes but none of them are funny
I am folding pamphlets and disturbing the peace
You are painting signs that say "De-Friend The Police"
I am dropping out of school to go to the park
If you’re the light of my life why is it always so dark?
I don’t know anything
You don’t know anything
We don’t know anything together
Life hands you problems, make problemade
Life hands you wages, minimum wage
The popcorn ceiling, the great divide
If you think I suck would you keep it to yourself?
You must be thinking of someone else
I am always hungry and I don’t have any cake
You are always on a plane and the plane is full of snakes
You are super fun. You’re a really nice guy.
And I’m a psychological Superfund site
I am yelling “someone’s in here” from the bathroom stall of life
You are logging onto Tinder getting zero Super Likes
I don’t like anything
You don’t like anything
We don’t like anything together
Life hands you problems, make problemade
Life hands you wages, minimum wage
The popcorn ceiling, the great divide
If you think this sucks would you keep it to yourself?
You must be thinking of something else
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2. |
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I need an empath, is that too much to ask?
I'm still holding my breath, can I stop holding my breath now?
It's a cakewalk, and I take it easy
These aren't gym shorts, they're athleisure
I need a frank talk, is that too much to ask?
I am double-fisting it: medications in one hand, placebos in the other Hand
I got a soul made of whole-grain mustard
I'm not normal, i'm unflustered
Do you want to see me wear a collared shirt?
Manipulation, influence, affluence and arrogance
Do you want to see me eating French dessert?
Persecution, placation, validation, Fast Food Nation
Do you guys want to see some pics of things i did on my vacation?
If I catch on fire, please put me out
If I get wet, please dry me off
If I have a heart attack, please give me CPR and continue the compressions till the ambulance arrives
If I forget my wallet, please loan me 20 bucks and pretend it never Happened and don't ask for it back
If you have to kill me, please cover me in dirt
If I catch on fire, please put me out
If I catch on fire, please put me out
When you need something from someone you haven't talked to in a Long time, do you just ask? Or do you call them first for quote-unquote No reason, and then a couple days later, call them again?
Do you want to see me wear a collared shirt?
Manipulation, influence, affluence and arrogance
Do you want to see me eating clumps of dirt?
Persecution, placation, validation, Fast Food Nation
Do you guys want to see some pics of things I did on my vacation?
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3. |
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Stuttering more lately s-s-s-s-s-s-saying stuff
Living here sucks if you're made out of dandruff
Weeds have overtaken the yard of my mind
What is a stalker but a friend that you don't like?
I'm bringing crying back
Crying's the new black
Crying on my snacks
Drop the buttered bread the buttered side down
I'm sure it's nothing, it's probably fine
No pocket for your phone in your surgical gown
I'm sure it's nothing, it's probably fine
I'm a block of marble you can chip chip chip away at me
There must be something good underneath ... just keep hammering
Everybody's free. Free to drink sunscreen
This song is not medical advice, ask a doctor if sunscreen is right for you
I'm bringing crying back
Crying's the new black
Crying on my snacks
Drop the buttered bread the buttered side down
I'm sure it's nothing, it's probably fine
Mass extinction, abduction, the traffic across town
I'm sure it's nothing, it's probably fine
Malicious alien landing, Yellowstone supervolcano
No exceptions or acceptance at the Waffle House
No pocket for your phone in your surgical gown
I'm sure it's nothing, it's probably fine
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4. |
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5. |
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He’s tall
He’s lean
He reeks of gasoline
And he has perfect credit, if you know what I mean
He is the air conditioning man
And he is keeping you cool with his giant fan
And I, on the other hand
I hope this bagel will never end
But he’s your ruthless dictator!
He’s your enlightened plutocrat!
He is dancing on the table in a shirt made of hats!
You didn’t start the bonfire of the vanities
But you’re tossing in our clothes and our humanities
And once a year, we act like we were glad you were born
You always want to bomb the Middle East on the weekend
When we could be cutting grass or eating cheese with your girlfriend
We could learn to read and write in Portuguese or Korean
But you always want to bomb the Middle East
You always want to bomb the Middle East on vacation
When we could just write a novel or recline in frustration
We could occupy the park across the street with a squirt gun
But you always want to bomb the Middle East
It’s crude
It’s rude
It’s full of toxins dude
It’s the underground hero to a special few
It ain’t broke so don’t fix it
And never change
No matter what
Meanwhile I?
I’m going to back school!
I’ve been eating mush all week and it’s time for round food!
But he’s your ruthless dictator!
He’s your straw man strongman!
He’s taking you to the Cinderella’s Castle of Shame at Disneyland!
We didn’t start the bonfire of the vanities
But we’re tossing in our clothes and our humanities
And once a year, we act like we were glad you were born
You always want to bomb the Middle East on the weekend
When we could be cutting grass or eating cheese with your girlfriend
We could learn to read and write in Portuguese or Korean
But you always want to bomb the Middle East
You always want to bomb the Middle East on vacation
When we could just write a paean or recline in frustration
You could occupy the park across the street with a Nerf gun
But you always want to bomb the Middle East
I didn’t start the bonfire of the vanities
But I’m tossing in my clothes and my humanity
And once a year, I act like I was glad I was born
You always want to bomb the Middle East on the weekend
When we could be cutting grass or planting trees with your girlfriend
We could learn to read and write in Cantonese or Italian
But you always want to bomb the Middle East
You always want to bomb the Middle East on vacation
When we could just write a poem or recline in frustration
You could occupy the park across the street with a squirt gun
But you always want to bomb the Middle East
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6. |
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I'm doing nothing like melatonin
I'm doing nothing like I'm verified
I'm holding out for important changes
I light nine candles for minimum wages
For the garbage man election day is still garbage day anyway
Next year in Jerusalem, OK
Your dad was a congressman
My dad was a dumpster-diving freegan
Dr. Bronner was not a real doctor
The name was mostly aspirational
For the garbage man election day is still garbage day nonetheless
Next year in Jerusalem, I guess
You just might understand this
This is not about a plane, train or automobile
Won't you understand?
Don't you understand me?
This is not about a plane, train or automobile
Won't you understand?
Don't you understand?
For the garbage man election day is still garbage day anyway
Next year in Jerusalem, OK
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7. |
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Here comes a sermon on forgiveness
Here comes another hill for you to climb
You’re a special guy, you have lots of talents
You should wear a seatbelt, it could save your life
We hum through our days of constant striving
And everybody seems to hum in time
The lies come for free
The truth’s behind a pay wall
For a dollar ninety nine
Every time I try
I lose track
I don’t text back
And they say don’t stop believing
But it’s just too late for that
I think it’s just too late for that
Everyone cool will die
Everyone weird will also die
What lives on is the destruction
Caused by market economics
Being unique does not fit neatly into the grid of corporate needs
Still I work like a dog doing a dog’s day’s work
And who could blame me? I live in a society
Every time I try
I lose track
I don’t text back
And they say don’t stop believing
But it’s just too late for that
I think it’s just too late for that
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8. |
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We would like to welcome the people who know nothing and think they Are better than us!
I'm not here to start a problem
I'm in line for fate
And if you want to know what love is, well, you're gonna have to wait
It's an unexpected skeptic who you met in Mexico
Echo, just look at the pinwheels:
I'm someone who wants to blow
And I'm belching at the graveyard
And I'm feeling strangely fine
It's a big blank distraction of the mind
Whatever you're looking for, you won't find it at school, you famous Internet doofus!
Adult recreation and I'm losing every time
And if winning's half the battle
I'll take the other half, it's fine
There's a bunch of random rich guys in Male Feminists The Band
And, as Sufjan Stevens sang, "I want to hold your freakin' hand"
Now I'm dead, sell my Krill vinyl
To the desperate Discogs guy
It's a big blank distraction of the mind
I'm going for my own jugular, or the jugular of someone who looks a Lot like me!
Happy to invite you
But you're gonna leave early
Of Mice & Men On Ice is not the break you seem to need
There's bad mojo at the dojo with no air conditioning
Sage your parking space
And take a chill pill for anxiety
I'm the Michael Phelps of eating snacks
The store's out of my size
It's a big blank distraction of the mind
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9. |
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I liked it better when you were standing next to me
I liked it better when you were standing next to me
I liked it better when you were standing next to me
I liked it better when you were standing next to me
My heart has hiccups, there's no relief
I'm eating salad and speaking my peace
I'm yelling "yo" outside your building at night
They call me Yo Guy
They call the police
I exercise so much to get you off my mind
I tried to cut my hair just like the band you like
I liked it better when you were standing next to me
I liked it better when you were standing next to me
I liked it better when you were standing next to me
I liked it better when you were standing next to me
My heart's head is getting a headache
I'm getting nauseous and puking up flowers
I hit my head on something twice in a row
I got a papercut from digging through your trash
i exercise so much to get you off my mind
i tried to cut my hair just like the band you like
I liked it better when you were standing next to me
I liked it better when you were standing next to me
I liked it better when you were standing next to me
I liked it better when you were standing next to me
Yo
Shut the fuck up!
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10. |
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|
Yeah
A big cup of noodles
A giant cup of noodles
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11. |
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i keep a list of everyone's mistakes and it's getting long
there's a new page in the menu of haters at this restaurant
we all wondered what you thought!
why don't you downgrade your review?
there's no letter in the Health Code for this busboy sniffing glue
You cut the cake
You lick the knife
You wipe away the crud of life
Killed myself with kindness
Then I panicked by myself
I saw someone i admired
I wasn't fine, why did i leave the house?
Is it fake fun that we are having?
Or an ad for being young?
No one here was trying to get here
Where the cloudy water runs
You cut the cake
you lick the knife
you wipe away the crud of life
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12. |
|
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I'm pulling weeds
The weeds are just some art I made, my canvas for anxiety
Think you could fall on that grenade?
It's your internship ... and there's no pay
No room for cream
No room for error or for doubt
No holier than tho or thou
Maybe light snacks are all you need
A giant pretzel could make you feel better
Bored of the dance, I laugh in spite of myself
What side of bread is the side with the butter on it?
Listen to your heart (no)
Keep on keeping on (no)
Just say "no" to drugs (no)
Eat a healthy lunch (no)
Draw outside the lines (no)
Pay your parking tickets (no)
Buy one get one free (no)
Turn the other cheek (no)
Just because it's funny doesn't make it a joke
Now stop meditating and take me to go bowl
Use it till it's gone (no)
Keep on keeping on (no)
Horse after the cart (no)
Listen to your heart (no)
My hall of fame
And panic is the sport I play
We always play on Saturday
You and I both in uniform
Wherever we go, we take our big-ass folding chairs
It's a fantastic way to build a monument
A monument to Ativan
Three-legged dogs don't seem to mind
Take a good idea and do it too much
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13. |
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Stuttering more lately s-s-s-s-s-s-saying stuff
Living here sucks if you're made out of dandruff
Weeds have overtaken the yard of my mind
What is a stalker but a friend that you don't like?
I'm bringing crying back
Crying's the new black
Crying on my snacks
But I only say I'm sorry when I'm wrong now
I only run the air when it's warm out
I only text the friends that i like now
I only talk trash if i thought it out
Everything's OK, nothing is on fire
I already burned it all and it's just ash now
I only drive the car if i can't walk around
I only say I'm sorry when I'm wrong now
I'm a block of marble you can chip chip chip away at me
There must be something good underneath ... just keep hammering
Everybody's free. Free to drink sunscreen
This song is not medical advice, ask a doctor if sunscreen is right for you
I'm bringing crying back
Crying's the new black
Crying on my snacks
But I only say I'm sorry when I'm wrong now
I only run the air when it's warm out
I only text the friends that i like now
I only talk trash if i thought it out
Everything's OK, nothing is on fire
I already burned it all and it's just ash now
I only drive the car if i can't walk around
I only say I'm sorry when I'm wrong now
Papercut from the frozen pizza box
You have received assurances that you are a friend of the pod
Balloon in the rafters is right twice a day
Sadly headbanging while you wait in the parking lot
You ruled the world for, like, three minutes
And now they have replaced everyone else on your flight with crying babies
You're the second person pissing in a pissing contest
But you could spread your wings and be in airplane mode
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14. |
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Nice haircut!
Nice charcoal lemonade
I woke up late for Earth and it made me late for Heaven
I regret to inform you you're not invited to the wedding, but you're Welcome at the funeral
I'm sorry. was that petty
Well the line is getting long if you want excessive drama
It's not art, it's something else
It's a good thing you're in good health, there's no cookies for the dead
No cops in a world of one
No masters in a world of one
Black eyes, black eyeliner and hair
Bury me with a sock tan, the sexy national anthem
Black eyes, black leather and flowers
Bury me with my drama, the sexy national anthem
Are you getting into welding?
Well I think it will do wonders for your industrial cred
I am sleeping with my eyes open
Mixing ZOLOFT and smartwater to make NyQuil for the soul
The dumb part is almost over now
It's my last day in this warehouse
When I die leave me alone
They say that our bodies are made of two-thirds water and one-third shame
No cops in a world of one
No masters in a world of one
Black eyes, black eyeliner and hair
Bury me with a sock tan, the sexy national anthem
Black eyes, black leather and flowers
Bury me with my drama, the sexy national anthem
No cops in a world of one
No Cheez-Its in a world of one
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15. |
treegirl - Pledge Drive
02:44
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I am living in an extra large box
It’s a nice big house with a TV/VCR
Where rats are eating all my earthly possessions
I called the pledge drive. I got the suicide hotline
Life’s little moments in an extra large box
Courting controversy in an esoteric field
Why don’t the police ever obey the law?
I don’t know anything. You don’t know anything
Statistically likely to be wearing a shirt
A shirt so white and starched you could spill coffee on it
Statistically likely to be trying to stay hydrated (but not that hydrated)
No one is mad at me
No one is mad at me
No one is mad at me
No one is mad at me
If woke dudes must die, I'm not first
I don’t know anything. You don’t know anything
If we must dumpster dive, I’ll go first
I don’t know anything. You don’t know anything
And if you think youth has been wasted on the young and the wasted
And so now one of us has to die, I’ll go first
I don’t know anything. You don’t know anything
I am a supergrain, I’m native to Peru
I thrive in the elevations of the Andes mountain range
I am arguably ruining the environment and the local economy
And you can substitute me for bulgur wheat
This mob of teens with sponges is ready to wash your car
I’m standing in the Wendy’s drive-thru screaming “FUCK ALL THE TRANSPHOBES”
I feel nothing and I’m 14-inches tall
I don’t know anything. You don’t know anything
Statistically likely to be wearing a shirt
A shirt so white and starched you could spill coffee on it
Statistically likely to be trying to stay hydrated (but not that hydrated)
No one is mad at me
No one is mad at me
No one is mad at me
No one is mad at me
If woke dudes must die, I'm not first
I don’t know anything. You don’t know anything
If we must dumpster dive, I’ll go first
I don’t know anything. You don’t know anything
And if you think youth has been wasted on the young and the wasted
And so now one of us has to die, I’ll go first
I don’t know anything. You don’t know anything
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16. |
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Coffee from the bank
Fritos isn't free
I only want to be with other people like me
Advil, Tylenol
There is no relief
I only want to be with other people like me
Let's just assume, for the sake of argument
That Chapstick causes chapped lips
And sunscreen causes sunburns
And music causes hearing loss
And bottled water makes you thirsty
And I am just a cat watching another cat on TV
I lit a match
I threw it in the trash
I tossed it all in the dumpster
The dumpster fire got bigger
Now we need a bigger dumpster and a book of matches
Everything is fine
Everything is fine
Everything is fine
I caught a cold
I coughed on all my friends
Now everyone is coughing on everybody else
And we're coughing on our doctors and our doctors cough out:
"Everything is fine!
Everything is fine!
Everything is fine!"
I crossed the street against the light
It backed up all the traffic
The drivers start to get out and confront me in the intersection
They are screaming:
"Everything is fine!
Everything is fine!
Everything is fine!"
Doing improv
Coffee, juice or tea?
I only want to be with other people like me
Seal Team 6 is here saging everything
I only want to be with other people like me
Let's just assume, for the sake of argument
That Chapstick causes chapped lips
And sunscreen causes sunburns
And music causes hearing loss
And bottled water makes you thirsty
And I am just a dog watching another dog on TV
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17. |
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|
Let's do the mortal coil shuffle
The cumulative average of wasted time
Anxiety plus caffeine
Every pleasure is guilty and the pleasure is mine
Only one of us is keeping score of the game
Where'd you get the band name? where'd you get the band name?
... Edible Arrangements
Everything is OK
Got my old phone replaced
Now I do nothing faster than I did yesterday
and I took off my shades just to fall on my face
it was such a disaster that i canceled my date (like I did before)
Life is long like a CVS receipt
Not much to do unless you eat your cake and dance like wedding guests
Life is long, there's no laundry left to clean
Not much to say unless you have a slow joke you wanted to tell, I guess
Let's do the in-limbo limbo
The emergency alert for celebrity net worth
Oh man, an omen
A man, a plan, a plain bagel and an omelette
One more song! one more song!
Yeah, we're getting famous, but they still spell our name wrong
some personal news:
Everything is OK
Got my old phone replaced
Now I do nothing faster than I did yesterday
and I took off my shades just to fall on my face
it was such a disaster that i canceled my date (like I did before)
Life is long like a CVS receipt
Not much to do unless you eat your cake and dance like wedding guests
Life is long, there's no laundry left to clean
Not much to say unless you have a slow joke you wanted to tell, I guess
CVS receipt, laundry left to clean
Eat your cake like wedding guests
A slow joke you can tell I guess
Life is long like a CVS receipt
Not much to do unless you eat your cake and dance like wedding guests
Life is long, there's no laundry left to clean
Not much to say unless you have a slow joke you wanted to tell, I guess
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18. |
baghead. - Election Day
01:38
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|
I'm doing nothing like melatonin
I'm doing nothing like I'm verified
I'm holding out for important changes
I light nine candles for minimum wages
For the garbage man election day is still garbage day anyway
Next year in Jerusalem, OK
Your dad was a congressman
My dad was a dumpster-diving freegan
Dr. Bronner was not a real doctor
The name was mostly aspirational
For the garbage man election day is still garbage day nonetheless
Next year in Jerusalem, I guess
You just might understand this
This is not about a plane, train or automobile
Won't you understand?
Don't you understand me?
This is not about a plane, train or automobile
Won't you understand?
Don't you understand?
For the garbage man election day is still garbage day anyway
Next year in Jerusalem, OK
|
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19. |
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|
Inspirás, exhalás, no tenés hambre pero podrías comer
Abrís la pintura de color azul, tu cara está bien, la mía también
Ya no te copa el estado de cosas, tus héroes han muerto, ahora el héroe sos vos
La gente dice un montón de cosas interesantes cuando te sacás los auris y tirás el celu al inodoro de la historia
Hoy día me disculpo si me equivoqué
Hoy día prendo el aire si calor hace
Hoy día llamo amigos si los quiero bien
Hoy día no boqueo si no lo pensé
Y todo está bien, nada se prende fuego
Yo ya quemé todo, cenizas quedan
Hoy día no manejo si puedo ir a pie
Hoy día me disculpo si me equivoqué
Cortarte con la cajita de la pizza, grabar un podcast una vez cada tanto
El globo en el techo está en su lugar dos veces al día
Se balancea triste mientras esperás el bondi
Fuiste el amo del mundo por tres minutos ahora estás rodeado de bebitos que lloran
Salís segundo en un concurso de meos
Pero alzás los brazos y entrás en modo avión
Hoy día me disculpo si me equivoqué
Hoy día prendo el aire si calor hace
Hoy día llamo amigos si los quiero bien
Hoy día no boqueo si no lo pensé
Y todo está bien, nada se prende fuego
Yo ya quemé todo, cenizas quedan
Hoy día no manejo si puedo ir a pie
Hoy día me disculpo si me equivoqué
Hoy día me disculpo si me equivoqué
Hoy día me disculpo si me equivoqué
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20. |
Brentr0n - Vegan Water
03:38
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I can’t communicate my needs and I don’t care if I smell good
Ain’t too proud to beg
Ain’t too proud to steal leftover dessert off another table
A black hole full of noodles
Vegan water in the sink
Ain’t too proud to plead
Baby you can knife my tires
All my friends are imaginary
I can do no wrong
I’m a corporatist statist monkey
I can do no wrong
My brain’s completely full
My brain’s completely full
Tide Pods in my mouth and my mind
I can do no wrong
The thing you hate the most? Well, I think it is completely anodyne
Don’t smash your fingers closing the window of opportunity
The periodic table of reality
The periodic table of haircuts
Ain’t too proud to just vibe
Baby you can slash my tires
All my friends are imaginary
I can do no wrong
Going ham with a chainsaw on a tree
I can do no wrong
My brain’s completely full
My brain’s completely full
You can’t fire me because I am dead
I can do no wrong
I can do no wrong
I can do no wrong
I can do no wrong
I can do no wrong
|
||||
21. |
|
|||
|
Everything is normal
Everything is normal
Everything is normal
Everything is normal
Hi! I'm interested in the job you have posted
It's too bad about what happened when you flashed in the pan
Due to personal reasons, i said nothing in therapy:
We just laughed and laughed and laughed and laughed and laughed
In the future, everyone will be my friend for 15 minutes
And we'll look amazing when we're in portrait mode
We are writers! creatives! we work remotely!
I am furiously Juuling™ on the coffee shop patio!
Don't want a hug, don't want to talk to a dude
Man I'll be in the corner, bring me water and food
I'm on the outside looking in at you inside looking out
It's your best life if it's the life that you're living right now
Don't want instructions but don't know what to do
Man I'll be in the corner, bring me water and food
Maybe you'll learn to make do with what you're doing without
It's your best life if it's the life that you're living right now
Hey! have a very, very, very interesting day!
Great minds think a lot, and so do ours, when it's boring
Let's pretend we're not bitter, or better than everything
They say smiling's contagious, but you know, so is yawning
In the future, no compliments are begrudgingly given
And we are not pathologically incapable of sincerity
We are writers! Creatives! We work remotely!
I'm getting a Gucci™ logo stick-and-poke, it's cheaper than therapy!
Don't want a hug, don't want to talk to a dude
Man I'll be in the corner, bring me water and food
I'm on the outside looking in at you inside looking out
It's your best life if it's the life that you're living right now
Don't want instructions but don't know what to do
Man I'll be in the corner, bring me water and food
Maybe you'll learn to make do with what you're doing without
It's your best life if it's the life that you're living right now
Everything is normal
Everything is normal
Everything is normal
Everything is normal
|
||||
22. |
|
|||
|
Here comes a sermon on forgiveness
Here comes another hill for you to climb
You’re a special guy, you have lots of talents
You should wear a seatbelt, it could save your life
We hum through our days of constant striving
And everybody seems to hum in time
The lies come for free
The truth’s behind a pay wall
For a dollar ninety nine
Every time I try
I lose track
I don’t text back
And they say don’t stop believing
But it’s just too late for that
I think it’s just too late for that
Everyone cool will die
Everyone weird will also die
What lives on is the destruction
Caused by market economics
Being unique does not fit neatly into the grid of corporate needs
Still I work like a dog doing a dog’s day’s work
And who could blame me? I live in a society
Every time I try
I lose track
I don’t text back
And they say don’t stop believing
But it’s just too late for that
I think it’s just too late
|
||||
23. |
|
|||
|
I can only do one normal thing a day
Order from the menu $20 buffet
I am people pleasing and I follow the rules
I am bending over backwards, does it make me look cool?
Who modeled the behavior in which I engaged
A permission structure built on what you took and what you gave
Say RIP to everyone who died
Everything is gray now, do you like it?
You know I only want it if you want it
Whatever you need now, we can make it
Out of plastic
Everything’s in place now, do you like it?
No matter what you don’t like, we can move it
I think we can make it
We can make it
Out of plastic
Maybe I should call and apologize
It isn’t what you ordered, but it’s battered and fried
Hold on just a second while I transfer you
A Zero and a Three, big gold balloons
Who modeled the behavior in which you engaged
A permission structure built on what I took and what I gave
Singin’ RIP to everyone who died
Everything is gray now, do you like it?
You know I only want it if you want it
Whatever you need now, we can make it
Out of plastic
Everything’s in place now, do you like it?
No matter what you don’t like, we can move it
I think we can make it
We can make it
Out of plastic
Is there recycling?
It's sorted
Everything is gray now, do you like it?
You know I only want it if you want it
Whatever you need now, we can make it
Out of plastic
Everything’s in place now, do you like it?
No matter what you don’t like, we can move it
I think we can make it
We can make it
I think we can make it
We can make it
I think we can make it
We can make it out of plastic
|
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